Being The Best You

We are all human. We make mistakes, but we learn from them as well. What is the method for recognizing life’s lessons in our down times? Teshuva, or returning to Hashem. The Rambam teaches us that real Teshuva (repentance) is not a one-time thing to correct some mistake or transgression. True Teshuva must be felt with the body, mind and soul; it’s a assessment about our way of life and how we can improve it. This is exactly the kind of effort needed to change our natural character, and that’s the commitment Hashem is looking for during the days leading up to Rosh Hashana.

The Talmud in Rosh Hashanah (15b) tells us that four things abolish negative heavenly decrees against a person. These are “Screams, Charity, a change of name, and a change of behavior (Ibid)”. We learn this about charity from an explicit verse which states “Charity saves from death (Proverbs 10:2)”. We similarly know this about ‘screams’ from a verse: “And they (the Jews) will scream out to Hashem in the midst of their suffering, and He will save them (Psalm 107:6)”. The verse also states about change of behavior: “And Hashem saw that they repented from their bad ways, and He reconsidered their punishment (Jonah 3:10)”. Finally, we see from Sarah Imenu (our Mother) that she was able to conceive only after she changed her name (Genesis 17). The Talmud also records an opinion which states that even a change of residence can help abolish evil decrees.

The Rambam (Sefer Madda, Hilchot Teshuva 2:4) understands from the above Gemarah that these four actions are actually always necessary for any penitent who wishes to do true teshuvah. He therefore writes that when one repents, he must cry out to Hashem to absolve him of his guilt and fix what was broken. Interestingly, the Rambam stresses that the way of true repentance is to constantly ask Hashem for forgiveness and not just once. This constant recall will help the penitent steer away from the possibility of repeating the improper behavior, which was also mentioned as a remedy in the above Gemarah. Similarly, when one has sufficiently corrected his attitude and behavior, he can say “I am no longer that person who sinned, but a different person in regards to that trait”. This is tantamount to a change of name, which represents a change of destiny and purpose.

The change of location, says the Rambam, is actually an allusion to self-exile (Ibid). The reason why self-exile helps with repentance is because it causes a person to be humble. Humility is a key factor in repentance because the root of any sin is always a sense of arrogance. Even to the smallest degree, arrogance must be present in any action which goes against the express Will of the Creator of Heaven and Earth. When one leaves behind his comfort zone, and the illusory honor derived from reputation and status, he is able to reevaluate life and rediscover Hashem’s Hand Guiding him. This is why self-exile helps a person be humble and fully repent.

The Rambam here gives us the keys to repentance, not just in action, but also in mindset. Someone who does Teshuva clearly changes not only his actions, but also his attitude. Following the Rambam’s method correctly will help atone for past sins and also prevent the occurrence of future ones as well. This is a real and sincere Teshuva that Hashem lovingly Accepts. May all our Tefilot (prayers) be accepted and may Hashem help us come closer to Him out of Awe and Love, Amen.

 By BJL Staff