Elul: It’s Time To Break That Habit

It is hard to believe that we are already in Elul and Rosh Hashanah is right around the corner. It is that beautiful time of year that we begin to introspect and think about the spiritual goals that we want to achieve in the coming year and necessary steps to accomplish each.

Yet, as we once again consider this process, one that we contemplated last Elul, and the Elul before that, we cannot help but recognize that there may have been many times that we have tried to take on new resolutions, yet we failed. We looked to accomplish certain goals; however, we may not have achieved them. Why is that? Time management coach Carl Pullein writes that this often occurs because we did not develop the necessary positive habits needed to accomplish our goal. We are living life by rote, following our usual course, and not breaking our old habits. To reach our goal, we need to take on new habits within our target arena that set us up for success. There is a wise saying that sums up this notion, “if you always do as you have always done, then you will always get what you have always got.”

To a Jewish mind, this concept is nothing new. The Shulchan Aruch tells us of a rather intriguing halachah, that during the aseret yemei teshuva (ten days of repentance between Rosh Hashanah and Yom Kippur) people are encouraged when eating bread to only eat Pat Yisrael (bread baked by a Jew). This stringency is mentioned even for one who does not intend to continue the practice after Yom Kippur has passed. The underlying theory behind this is that people are encouraged to take on chumrot (additional stringencies) in halachah during this time that they may not be ordinarily accustomed to.

I always had a difficult time understanding this concept. What are we trying to accomplish? Are we looking to superficially convince ourselves that we are on a higher level just for those few days? Are we attempting to fool Hashem into believing that since we are taking on this stringency, our overall observance of halachah has significantly improved? In essence, what are we accomplishing by taking these stringencies, especially for such a short time? I was so excited when I saw a beautiful thought written in the name of Rav Eliyahu Dessler zt”l that sheds light onto this interesting practice. The reason we have a hard time changing and growing in our avodat Hashem is because our usual habits and routines may not be conducive to achieving the spiritual goals that we are looking to accomplish. In turn, we end up living life by repetition consistently following our tried-and-true practices (i.e., our same sleeping schedule, amount of time spent on our phones, speed of brachot/t’filah, or speaking without forethought). However, when we are able to “break the habit” even just once and actually prove to ourselves, “Yes, I can stop and think about the words when I recite Asher Yatzar,” or “I actually put down my mobile device for 5 minutes in the middle of the day and instead learned a few mishnayot,” or “I had a conversation with my coworker and held back a negative thought about our boss,” then we come to realize that we do not need to continue living life with longstanding habits, routines, and practices, rather we have the strength and the ability to take on new behaviors that lead to the development we seek.

So, why would one take on the stringency of pat Yisrael for only a few days if that will not be a ritual year-round? By following a new level of adherence even for a short interval, one is proving to themselves that they can follow a new path and the past does not have to be our future. The physical act of purchasing and consuming a different type of bread shows us that we are now empowered to break conventional patterns and alter our destiny. When we prove our competences to ourselves then we can look inward and say, “If I can change my lifestyle regarding my bread choice, then I can also change my Torah learning routine, and that of my t’filah and relationships. I can take on new customs and engage in new actions throughout my day that will bring on progress. This halachah is so inspiring that its real purpose is to pull ourselves out of living life by rote, and teach us to mature and cultivate a fruitful existence. B’ezrat Hashem, through this new realization we will be able to motivate ourselves to take on the necessary habits to achieve the spiritual ambitions we yearn to complete as we rapidly head towards the Yamim Tovim. 

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Rabbi Yaakov Moskowitz is a motivational speaker who has inspired Jews around the world through his engaging lectures and videos on a wide array of practical Jewish topics. To receive Rabbi Moskowitz’s short clips, email This email address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it..